Emotion Commotion: Pride Goeth Before Destruction

Mother said that I was the sweetest baby. She said she would put me in a play crib, and I would just sit and play. I didn't fuss, wasn't selfish and was always the quiet one. Even as a little girl, I was quiet and agreeable. Well, I grew up a little. I tell you, I am not always that sweet anymore.

We moved to the country, and we were given the freedom of going outside and running all of our energy out playing. Eric was about two when we moved here. Jocelyn was only two years older than I was. We were the band who went out nice and clean and came in grass-stained and dirty-faced. Then Jocelyn grew up a little more. She didn't want to come outside with us to play. By that time, Hannah was old enough to come out. We had such a fun time. Ah, but time... it went by too fast, for I also grew.

It not until this past summer that I began to realize I need to mature and try to act like a young lady, not a hooligan. I stayed indoors most times. I took to reading my books by myself and not wanting anyone about while I read. I would go outside by myself and I would be called in when someone wondered what had happened to me. I can you I got in more trouble being outside by myself than the Littles did when they were out without permission. In the winter last year, I probably spent three or four hours a day in my room, either cleaning, reading or writing.

Proverbs 16:18
Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.

You would not believe, from either reading my blog or meeting me in person, that I am, at times, both bitter and prideful. I have built a wall around my heart, my feelings, and my mind for a long time. I am not sure when I starting building this impenetrable wall that is surrounding my heart. I have many times kept my feelings bottled up inside. It keeps eating away at me because I won't let anyone help me with my problems.

I used to have a tendency to go to my room and read for hours on end, by myself. When I would come down, Mother would ask me what I was doing. She disliked the fact that I was alone. I sometimes dislike the fact that I spend more time by myself doing things, than I do with my family. I don't spend as much time in my room alone now as I did before.

I am telling you this because it has a part to do with why I am bitter and prideful.

But I am sure you would like to know how I became prideful and bitter, right? Well, I am not sure when Jocelyn stopped being a clean freak, cleaning everyday, six hours a day, but after she stopped, I picked up on it. I am not as worried about having a clean house anymore. I do try to make sure it is picked up and swept when Father gets home. What I am trying to say is I became very prideful because I would clean all day, then make dinner by a certain time and then go and do the barn chores. I began to feel prejudice against my sisters because I was doing all the work, and they weren't. That had something to do with my being bitter too.

Psalm 10:1-3

"1Why standest thou afar off, O LORD? why hidest thou thyself in times of trouble?
2The wicked in his pride doth persecute the poor: let them be taken in the devices that they have imagined.
3For the wicked boasteth of his heart's desire, and blesseth the covetous, whom the LORD abhorreth."

I am not saying that I persecuted them, but I had an air of authority over them which I should not have had.

Here are some verses I found about pride and what it can do to you:

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Psalm 10:4&5

"4The wicked, through the pride of his countenance, will not seek after God: God is not in all his thoughts. 5His ways are always grievous; thy judgments are far above out of his sight: as for all his enemies, he puffeth at them."

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Psalm 36:11&12

"11Let not the foot of pride come against me, and let not the hand of the wicked remove me. 12There are the workers of iniquity fallen: they are cast down, and shall not be able to rise."

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Psalm 75:6

"6Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment.

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Proverbs 11:12

"1A false balance is abomination to the LORD: but a just weight is his delight. 2When pride cometh, then cometh shame: but with the lowly is wisdom."

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Proverbs 13:10

"Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom."

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Proverbs 29:23

"A man's pride shall bring him low: but honour shall uphold the humble in spirit."

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Obadiah 1:3
"The pride of thine heart hath deceived thee, thou that dwellest in the clefts of the rock, whose habitation is high; that saith in his heart, Who shall bring me down to the ground?"

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1 Timothy 3:6

"Not a novice, lest being lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil."

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Mark 7:21-23

"21For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, 22Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: 23All these evil things come from within, and defile the man."

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Psalm 31:20

"Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence from the pride of man: thou shalt keep them secretly in a pavilion from the strife of tongues."

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Here also are some verses about being bitter:

Proverbs 17:24-26

"24Wisdom is before him that hath understanding; but the eyes of a fool are in the ends of the earth. 25A foolish son is a grief to his father, and bitterness to her that bare him. 26Also to punish the just is not good, nor to strike princes for equity."

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Proverbs 14:9-11

"9Fools make a mock at sin: but among the righteous there is favour.
10The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy. 11The house of the wicked shall be overthrown: but the tabernacle of the upright shall flourish."

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Acts 8:22&23

"22Repent therefore of this thy wickedness, and pray God, if perhaps the thought of thine heart may be forgiven thee. 23For I perceive that thou art in the gall of bitterness, and in the bond of iniquity."

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Romans 3:13&14

"13Their throat is an open sepulchre; with their tongues they have used deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips: 14Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness:"

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Ephesians 4:30-32

"30And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. 31Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

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Hebrews 12:14&15

This verse tells us to not let any bitterness take root in our hearts.
"14Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: 15Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;"

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Please, as a Sister in Christ, I beg of you, if you have any bitterness or pride in you, let it go. Pull out those roots. You need to take a note of what pride can do to you.
It says in Proverbs 16 that "18Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall. But you need to know what bittereness can do also if it takes hold as it did to me. I know this next verse is not entirely about what will happen if you are bitter, but it does give a good understanding."

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Ephesians 4:31

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

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You will be angry and evil speaking and a great many other things if you are bitter, I know from first-hand experience. Romans 12:10 tells us to "Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another;" look a little farther down in verse 18, If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.

I hope I have encouraged you to uproot any pride or bitterness you have in your heart. I am surely convicted of my own. Next month's edition will be on Untrue Beauty and True Beauty, which so many girls get confused in. Please join me.